MySmallville.

Tuesday, January 04, 2011

'Whenever you take independent people accustomed to daily interactions with family, friends, or associates, and suddenly move them to a setting where the entire focus is on what's wrong with them- a setting where they have very little else to distract them-you can virtually GuRrANTeE they will suffer from boredom, depression, or both' . Something I read.

No wonder the past months when I was at home most of the time I cried a lot. At times I seriously don't even know why I was crying.I was also really really emotional. Even the slightest things people say to me will make me tear up..lol. Alhamdulillah that doesn't happen anymore. When I was schooling, I'll reach home every day after 10pm, only on Tuesdays. Even on Sundays I was out the whole day teaching at Madrasah Al-Junied. Then suddenly Allah tested me with this illness..So from being out everyday, I was then at home or in the hospital everyday. Alone. No wonder I was depressed. I think the meds also had a real toll on me..I was taking 9 pieces of steroids everyday and some painkillers on top of other medication. At night I would be in pain, and all I wanted to do was sleep. The meds also caused me to be drowsy! Aaaargghh! Everyday I would fall asleep before 9.30pm. I know. Most nights it was painful and I had to wait almost an hour before I could fall asleep. Alhamdulillah that doen't happen anymore too. Now I sleep like a baby :) . Now I'm really xxxxxx thankful Alhamdulillah that my face is going back to normal. Imagine seeing your face puffed up with a lot of acne every time you look at the mirror everyday for 7 months. On top of that everywhere on your body has a lot of scars on it. Even you would be depressed and try to hide..lol.

Okay! Stop with the flashback miseries..haha. I think I never said all of this out loud before. Just venting out and burying them from now. Btw, I think only a few people are going to read this. Pull-up bar, you're going to be my bestest friend in the future..lol. Of course..everything was overcome through a lot of doa,hope, faith and definitely usaha. & of course the support of your family. Alhamdulillah for giving me the patience, strength and insight and understanding from now on..on how sick/unable people really feel. I didn't really understand until I felt it myself.

Advice to every body: Try not to take panadols. Use ointment instead. & do not eat instant food..the consequences are bad. ;) Sorry to burst your bubble to those who especially like instant noodles!

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Sharifah Faatimah. 18 years young.Recuperating climber.

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